Well, this is hard to write and even harder for me to comprehend. I have in all means of the words “let myself go”. Last year my lowest weight was 304 in April. Here I am 30 pounds heavier, a year older, and weighing the most I have ever weighed. When have I had enough? When will I push myself and eat well? When will I work out consistently? I need change. I need to be healthy.

I have recognized the things that are keeping me back. I need to overcome these obstacles so I can see a lasting difference.

First thing I have to admit is, I am addicted to sugar. Yes this is a real addiction. It has been study by multiple doctors and scientist and it is an addiction. I can not go a day with out sugar. I have small candies and some days a candy bar, honey in my teas, sugar in my coffee, and loads of unhealthy carbs such as crackers.

The second thing I admit is, I have a hard time managing the food I eat. Every meal is full of carbs and is way too much. I tend overeat most days, causing me to feel groggy. My calorie intake is way too much and I need to monitor my food.

The final thing I have to admit is, my workouts are not as strong as they should be and not as consistent. I have been going to the gym for over a year, however, I have too many days off and don’t really push myself. I need to be able to workout 4 times a week and really try hard. I loath going to the gym and working out but I know eventually I will love it.

This is a mental battle first and foremost. If I keep my mind strong, don’t give into temptations, and truly push myself, I will succeed. Thank you all for the constant support. I won’t let you or myself down anymore.